Heart's Strugle

This isn't a poem
This is my heart's note...

February...
Entering this month in cold way
It supposed to be the month of love
But it seems to me that I'm way from that
I'm not happy
Lost my joy
I can't even smile
Bitter pills on my touge
Pretending is what I most do this month so far
I'm sick of it
Dry and witter
How long would it be last?
What's the goal of all of these nonsenses?
Facing heart of stone
Lost my courage
Lost my good will
Leave many questions
Arouse many suspicions
Bad judges risen
Ruin a relationship
Is it worthed?
My my...why is it so hard?